Yes, loads of papers to read and a great many oral presentations needed to prepare. Something happens to me, our professor keeps giving us the papers which are all based on the idea of diaspora, but it really annoys me in grasping the meaning behind the text within. I feel depressed and frustrated since I can hardly stand the shoes on someone losing their family or ancestors or some other reason related to the very concept of "Home." I really don't have a clue, and I feel I can't do that kind of research anymore. No, certainly not. Besides this, to raise a question with deeper issue or profound concept. Others can but I can't!! Why? It seems that something goes extreme in my brain, fails to confront the predicament I have at present. And I always know that I lack those experiences in living, I mean, something about life, sympathy, and epiphany so on. This time, I kind of hate the young age for myself. The unknown situation, the unknown knowledge, and the unknown future, keep haunting me more or less. I don't want to be hurt in this way. And I hope some miracles could really happen by the time I should be awaken in some certain moment. Where do I go, I don't even know. Sometimes you need to believe, which lies on the way you only wish to hold on. Bless me.

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